A Tale Of Two Arseholes. (conceded, my punch line will have been anticipated well before the end of the piss take. but do I care? do I f**k :) as the pleasure is in the telling.

Pre. May 2004, cannot be more precise that that on this occasion I'm afraid. On the place I can be. The A4157 Elmhurst Rd. was where I delivered a well deserved coup de grace.

The conversation centred around what useless drivers all other road users are and what a brilliant and very experienced, was the driver of the BT PEU vehicle I was a passenger in. And how he has always been a brilliant driver (sic) having been driving virtually since he could walk, according to the verbal diarrhoea I and other BT operatives were frequently treated to during the course of a BT workday.

I will spare the reader the details of those far too many to count: ...vis is how good I am, ...vis is how clev'a I am, ...vis is what an over-achiever I am, ...vis is how much amazing and difficult and clev'a things I've done... ...yeah I've driven all over vu place...(sic) rantings of an mentally immature, insecure, shallow, weak, hen-pecked excuse for a man, who's incessant drivel I had to listen on a daily basis c.2001/5. After Dec 2005, strangely enough, I never heard another peep out of the sad racist twat.

So, there I was, in transit back to BTs (nick)Griffin Ln. yard, listening to monotonous shite about what a bunce of useless cunts (sic) other road users were, and thought I would give the twat more rope by lighting the touch paper (mixed metaphors. so!)

So I said: You use to do a lot of driving didn't ya _____?  ...didn't you use to drive for a living...?

And off the twat went, on a bullshit rant about his delusional driving prowess replying: Oh yeah, when I was driving for....blah blah blah...

For the umpteeth time I listened to the tripe being spouted, and, as I was doing so I did I recall the same person gobbing off about the reason he had eventually given up full time driving for a living and managed to con his way into BT employment in the early '90s, alongside his Waddesden Transport suck buddy, a sad and pathetic little individual by the name of frank - thick as a plank - hackett. aka dominic martello/distefano's - bacon sandwich eating - banker and financial backer.

So after some minutes of listening to the driver's drivel, I said: Why did you jack in the driving _____?

...Oh, that was mainly coz of me back, wunnit.

To which I replied: Was it bad then _____? , what was the problem with your back?

BINGO !

I was then treated to a detailed and graphic description of a badly infected chronic pilonidal cyst condition and the resulting medical course of treatment underwent by the infected individual. 

n.b. a pilonidal cyst, I presumed, was what was being described to me by the individual concerned.

FYI: Pilonidal cysts are thought to be an acquired condition involving midline pits in the gluteal cleft. These pits are actually enlarged hair follicles in the skin. Gravity and movement of the buttocks create a vacuum that pulls on the hair follicle, allowing bacteria from the skin and/or the area between the genital organs and the anus and debris from the anus to enter this area, leading to local inflammation and infection. The resulting swelling (edema) closes the mouth of the follicle, while the follicle continues to expand and finally ruptures into the fatty tissue that underlies the area. This releases keratin (the principal component of hair) and pus, setting into motion a foreign body reaction that produces acute and chronic abscesses and sometimes fistulae.

Risk factors associated with the development of pilonidal cysts include repeated local traumatic irritation, sedentary occupation and lifestyle, obesity, congenitally increased depth of the gluteal cleft, poor hygiene, and activities resulting in increased sweating. Those individuals who have dark, stiff, or coarse hair tend to develop the disease more frequently. The disease most often affects individuals between the ages of 25-30.

A pilonidal cyst that looks like a swollen area or nodule, feels warm, and is tender to touch, will be apparent along the midline of the lower spine, approximately 1 to 2 inches (2 to 5 cm) above the anal opening. Openings 1 to 2 inches in length may be seen in chronic or recurrent disease. Foul-smelling pus may drain from the lesion, and a tuft of fine hair may protrude from the cyst. The surrounding area may appear reddened. A manual anorectal examination may be performed to detect fistulae or other defects.

Pilonidal cysts require improving hygiene practices, including keeping the area free of hair. Additionally, patients should be instructed to avoid sitting for long periods, and, if overweight they should strive to lose weight. In first-time acute episodes of the disease with abscess formation, the treatment of choice is simple incision and drainage, which is done on an outpatient basis. With incision and drainage, the individual lies face down (prone) and the area is cleaned and prepped with an iodine solution before a local anesthetic is injected. A small incision is made off the midline, the abscess is drained, and hair and other debris are removed. The wound is then packed loosely with gauze to allow continued drainage over the following 2 days. Afterwards, the individual is encouraged to clean the site with warm sitz baths or showers 2 to 3 times per day for 1 to 2 weeks (Lanigan). The individual is advised to avoid prolonged sitting.

...In short, the erstwhile infected individual concentrated on describing to me the extended time he  had to spend in the prone position, and going into graphic detail about the out patient treatment received in relation to having the dirty, pus & hair- ball filled type hole that had formed at the base of his spine, cleaned and treated and stuffed with a large quantity of gauze etc. ...yeah, vu amount of fuckin stuff vey shoved up vee hole ...fucking 'ell...(sic)

When I had heard enough I brought the proceedings that was the topic of discussion to an abrupt halt.

I said: So is what you're telling me ____y, is that you've got two arseholes? That you're a double arsehole?

The look of realisation that he had been set up on the face of the twat was a picture. He never talked to me much about his pre BT driving days after that.

Yep, my ...you're a double arsehole ____y occurred on the A4157 on route back to BTs (nick)Griffin Ln. yard in the company of a prick with two arseholes. Not counting the arsehole he uses to talk with when mumbling perjurious evidence into the public record against me resulting in my unconscionable and wholly unjustified criminal conviction.

p.s. The above tale of two arseholes, is small beer compared to the graphic details I and others were treated to by this particular "substantive" C1 grade BT IT Gold User team leader supervisor BT PEU operative's fellow BT C1 (acting C1 that is, not a "substantive" C1) a big mouth bullying gobshite by the name of pandy poozicKA, who regaled unfortunate BT employees with his little hemorrhoids difficulties c. 2004  

2Bcontd...

I know I know, dream on Colin. The positive being I give deserving mendacious workplace bullies, racists, harassing cowards who are BT/CWU morons, endless sleepless nights and nightmares when those 'persons' go to bed and close their eyes every night. ;) - I, on the other hand, go to bed every night, close my eyes and sleep the sleep of the happy and the content ! Zzzz.... :)

I have a dream that one day white people will stop protecting other white people out of their fear of those white people and/or out of corporate/business expediency.

I have a dream that one day cowardly stupid Uncle Tom black person(s) will stop betraying black people out of their fear of standing up to the majority white people and/or out of those cowardly, stupid Uncle Tom black person's being risk averse and/or too cowardly, too unprincipled and too chicken-shit scared a black twat to speak and express the truth about some bad and stupid white persons and about some bad and stupid black persons to the white people who have the control the power and the authority in the white workplace / white trade union place wherein those black people co-exist with the majority white people.

I have a dream that in that way those black persons and those white persons can go home and look their children in the eye with a clear clean conscience and put their head on the pillow at night with a clear clean conscience as a decent clean honest black man, as a decent clean honest white man who has NOTHING to hide from anybody.

NOT to be at home with you wife and child/children and KNOW that YOU are a compromised, dishonest, mendacious, duplicitous cowardly hypocrite - or worse - when in a white employer's workplace where your wife and/or your child/children cannot see and cannot hear what you do and how you conduct yourself: as a stupid cowardly lying white man in the majority / as a stupid cowardly lying black man in the minority.

That is the dream I have.

I know I know, dream on Colin !!!

:-) As my and my siblings' late dear mother would oft times say to her eight children individually and collectively... Que sera sera, what will be... :)

What's your dream? SHARE!

"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character."

Martin Luther King, Jr.

White noise. (sic)

At Milton Keynes Magistrates' Court 25/6, when giving evidence my witness Jason Jennings responding to a question about his knowledge and experience of the CPS witness as the "substantive" C1 grade BT IT Gold User team leader supervisor under who's BT workplace authority he had worked, in relation to the CPSs witness being labelled a racist coward by the defendant within his social media mass communication websites.

Jason said that the CPSs witness is a racist, a bullying lying coward racist individual and that for example, when travelling as a passenger alongside that racist  "substantive" C1 grade BT IT Gold User team leader supervisor  BT employee, in a PEU BT vehicle, his ears would be constantly assaulted with the racist rants and racist bile from the CPSs witness. " It was like white noise is the best way to describe it, a constant, continual racist drivel about that his racist hatred of black and asian people". Jason gave further evidence that in his view the CPSs witness is obsessed and fixated on his racist hatred of none white people and would talk of little else when driving as a "substantive" C1 grade BT IT Gold User team leader supervisor BT employee  (2Bcontd...)



(p.s. c. Aug. 2006. Jason called me and imparted that: I've been speaking to the Oxford boys i.e. graham, john, dave etc and they say that ruzicKA and his C1 good buddy are fighting like cat and dog when they're on site working with us. Shouting and bawling at each other, followed by e.g. you can follow him, I'm going a different way to that cunt (sic) when travelling from one pole put up to the next. Jason said that the onlookers thought this was all very entertaining and amusing and that possibly ruzicKA and his C1 buddy may come to blows before long, if we're lucky. 2Bcontd...)

FYI (a) 8/9/13 Colin Deryck Jarvis Facebook account: Disabled - Fake Account. (sic) Fair enough, I will fight FB Inc. and fight that totally wrong and totally unjustified action. My chances of success? Who knows! FYI (b) Saddam Hussein Dec. 2003. (p.s.*)

(p.s.* end of post)

FYI (b). BT PEU operative Jon Ivey, myself and a "substantive" C1 grade BT IT Gold User team leader supervisor PEU operative were working Sunday overtime near Newbury, a bog standard, uneventful DP c/o in a small village adjacent to the village shop. I was a passenger in a BT PEU vehicle and Jon drove the cherry picker. 

Three things stick in my mind from that bit of xmas time Sunday o/t. 

The 1st thing: When onsite in the a.m. Jon was in, none negotiable, need of a tom tit when on site and the local exchange was too far away. I was grinning like an idiot when I gave Jon a bags packing no.3 and told him not to stink up the back of the van! (hee!)

The 2nd thing: Packing up at the end of the job for the return trip to Aylesbury, Jon receives a phone call and my and the "substantive" C1 grade BT IT Gold User team leader supervisor PEU operative's attention was grabbed when within a few seconds of answering Jon shouts ...have they got him?, you're joking, have they? they got the cunt... ....haaaaaa.

Yes that is correct. The whereabouts and hiding place of a despot and criminal had been discovered in Iraq.   

The 3rd thing: In transit home (and as God is my witness because the coincidence is ball achingly funny, we were travelling along Ellen Rd. and passing Mandeville school at that very time) nearing BT (nick)Griffin Ln. TEC, I listened to a brief asymmetrical phone conversation which took the following course: 

...ullo, what's up?

________

...yeah alright, he's gonna geddit...

_______ 

...he's gonna fucking geddit, wat's vu panic wat ya panicking abowt... ...it's got 

_________

...it's over a fuckin week away, course he'll geddit in time.

________

...yeah yeah alright, i wont be long anyway.

After that somewhat loud phone conversation, which obviously angered the recipient, was terminated the driver of the BT PEU asset, without me making any enquiry whatsoever in respect of the asymmetrical phone conversation I had just heard, said to me that he was to be the recipient of a brand new netball ring and post which was being 'liberated' from Mandeville school courtesy of a employee of that local education authority who is a friend of the family and that his wife was demanding it's delivery forthwith and that this was unreasonable of her as xmas was two weeks hence and to demand possession of the brand new netball stand & ring now (for wrapping purposes one presumes) as she was doing simply ...fucks me off. (sic)

I in turn wished the driver good luck in eventually securing possession of stolen local education authority property and hoped it went down well on xmas morning with the 'lucky' child on who's behalf this described theft was being perpetrated.

FYI (a) Moral of the tale: If a person is a pathological racist, a diligent, a proud, a closet pathological racist in combination with being a moronic desperate pathological liar and that person... (and his Uncle Tom black person suck buddy-which is ironic seeing as though this same white person in question loathes, despises and detests black people and Asian people with a passion, and spent the best part of five years diligently articulating and demonstrating the fact of his racist beliefs and his racist mindset directly to me and to other BT employees within BTs workplace) ...is responsible for my multiple arrests and detentions by the police and responsible for a wrongful, unconscionable criminal conviction and criminal record being handed down to an innocent, truthful black man. 

Then the moral of the tale is: If you are not prepared to walk the walk don't talk the talk of your filthy pig ignorant retarded halfwit racist shit to me and then from day one start and continue to lie and deny, deny and lie to other white people. 

Continually lying and denying and telling those white people that the black man who had invited you to walk the walk is a liar, is a dishonest vexatious liar, because you are not a BT workplace racist as alleged. 

Lying and denying to people who are white like you, the fact of what you are and the fact of what you represent and the fact of what you stand for and calling the black man who is holding you accountable and responsible an untrustworthy, dishonest black man, a black man who is lying to white people with decision making authority and power about another white person. 

Because all that will happen is that the black man - who was your, and your Aylesbury & Oxford BT white suck buddy, BT workmates'  erstwhile victim, whom you & they targeted with absolute relish and abandon and with complete confidence in yourself/themselves and absolute belief in your/their permanent job security and protection  by other white persons within a white employer's - BT Group's - workplace. 

All that will happen is that black man will place the facts of the matter exactly where those facts belong and place you/they exactly where you all belong and where you/they desperately do not want to be placed in: i.e. Into the public domain, into the court of public opinion.

So that decent and honest white people and decent and honest black people who are not like you - or like your white BT suck buddies and who are not like your/their Magic Roundabout slimy snail-Brian black person 'new' friend - can learn about you all. In order to allow decent, honest and proper white people and decent, honest and proper black people to make up their own minds as to the facts of the matter. :)  

In other words if a racist person relishes, like a gorging retard, absolutely relishes talking the talk of his cowardly, backward, halfwit racist filth to a black man. But that same racist person declines to walk the walk when invited to do so, and instead walks into BTs FS1GC talking shop / walks into a private (expensive) solicitor's talking shop, walks (as in: sneaks into court 4 times and hides behind a sight screen on 4 separate occasions) into a public court of law talking shop and proceeds to call me Colin Jarvis, a liar. 
Resulting in: 
(i) my criminal conviction and criminal record. 
(ii) my deprived of my liberty. 
(iii) my being financially penalised. 
(iv) my legitimate, true, accurate exercise of my lawful honest comment free expression Colin Deryck Jarvis FB account being unjustifiably disabled as a fake account. etc. 

Then those actions of such a person(s) will result in Colin Jarvis disseminating, using my considerable recall and memory, which is every bit as good as yours, to articulate, to describe and to disseminate my empirical knowledge of all of that which my senses were party to concerning BT and the CWU and specific and particular persons therein. 

I will wash your dirty linen in public. 

I will out the dirty, filthy skeletons in you cupboard. 

I will strip you and your BT Ayelsbury TEC & Oxford BT TEC white suck buddies to the bone of your/their cowardly deceit. I will strip you and your white BT mates and that Magic Roundabout snail black person Uncle Tom BNP sphincter licking batty bwoy of yours, to the bone in public. Strip you, strip them of your, of their (plain as the nose on your stupid faces) Emperor's new clothes. Strip you bare of the stupid, the desperate and the so so obvious deceit in which you cloth yourselves within BTs workplace, within the CWUs workplace, within civil proceedings and within a court of law. (which is committing perjury, as you well know!) 

Please feel absolutely free and at liberty to do the exact same thing to me. As is your absolute right. True, you may be complained about (but not by me I guarantee you of that) and so you may be arrested multiple times and be brought before a court of law multiple times.  
But I am certain that, you like me, are a man of principle and will not be frightened off, intimidated and/or bullied by the police, the CPS or bullied by a legal aid solicitor into walking away from those strongly held principles you hold as a honest, decent man. 

Because I can guarantee one thing, I will not be complaining to anybody about anything any other person(s) puts into the public domain of the BT Cloud, into the www.Cloud concerning Colin Jarvis. So, please feel free.

And if any social media mass communication service provider tries to prevent you, for example by disabling your FB page or your Blogger site, please let me know and I will speak up for your rights and defend you right to free expression, your right to honest comment. 

And I promise not to sue you for defamation.

2Bcontd...    

p.s. I have very raraely previously, in my life, been so utterly amused as I was on hearing the first question my Barrister put to the Crown's witness on being invited to do so by the presiding Judge. as in:

Mr _____, why are you not suing my client? You assert that Mr Jarvis is lying about you, that he is disseminating untruths and falsehoods about you within his social media content, why don't you sue him?

I was laughing so hard my nuts hurt :)

Summer of 2001. Bierton Rd. A.V.D.C. Allotment site.

My first visit to A.V.D.C. Bierton Rd Allotment site was in the summer of 2001. I and steve williams my fellow B2 grade BT PEU operative were taken onto that site by a "substantive"(if you don't mind!) C1 grade BT IT Gold User team leader supervisor during the afternoon of a working day. The "substantive"(if you don't mind!) C1 grade BT IT Gold User team leader supervisor informed us that he had very recently secured a plot tenancy and was now the proud tenant of plot 13. We spent a good hour on site. The plot was totally and completely uncultivated and unused. A collapsing - bruck up - shed and a dilapidated greenhouse were in place at the rear of the plot. No gardening tools or equipment were evident. In short the plot was a complete mess and unused for what must have been a considerable number of years.

Yet three separate courts were told by the CPS's witness that he had held that allotment plot tenancy for over 20 years i.e. since 1991. So why did the plot look like an uncultivated shit pile in the summer of 2001. n.b. The court (5/9/13) accepted the CPSs witness's 22 yrs allotment tenancy shit. (2bcontd...)

FYI. 1. When working at a BT PCP on Oldhams Meadow in Oct. 2000 with colin hunt, a BT operative whom I worked alongside c.Dec. 1999 to Nov. 2000, colin hunt had presented ...you know that twat in the yard who puts up the poles? I replied: ...You mean the person who walks around wearing a BT tie which he thinks makes him look important and intelligent, yeah I've seen the arsehole, what about him? colin hunt replied: ...he's been bragging that he's not long bought a house around here, just round the corner, ain't long moved in, he won't shut the fuck up about his poxy rabbit hutch. (sic) 

FYI. 2. I know that the 'twat' (sic) colin hunt was referring too, originally lived in Weston Turville. Up until when, I don't know. Where he lived in 1991, when is the time he stated under oath, he has been a Bierton Rd. allotment plot tenant I do not know. What I do know is that to be the tenant of three allotment plots on two separate allotment sites is being a little greedy. :(

The allotment plot I and steve williams were taken onto during that working day and on many subsequent workdays with numerous other BT operatives in tow, certainly had not been used for the proceeding 10 years i.e. from 1991. It would not otherwise have been in the abandoned, neglected and totally uncultivated condition it was - i.e. a overgrown abandoned piece of waist grown - in the summer of 2001 when I and steve williams was first shown that allotment plot, now would it? 

Three separate courts were also told that that same Bierton Rd. site contained a varying number of plots. In one court the number was ...about a 130, in another court the number was ...100 to 120 and in yet another court it was ...over a 100 ...I ain't weelly counted 'em (sic) Yeah, not much you haven't. Reader, it is a fact that the CPS witness who gave evidence against me under oath from behind a screen, knows the whole of that Bierton Rd. allotment site like you know the back of your hand. After all, he personally has been an allotment tenant on that site for well over 20 years according to evidence given under oath.

Previously A.V.D.Cs. now A.T.Cs Bierton Rd. allotment site as a matter of simple fact contains 71 plots. 

Immediately inside the entrance gate on the left is a incongruous metal plate sticking out of the ground marked 71 indicating plot 71 and opposite that sign is another incongruous metal plate sticking out of the ground marked 1. How can anybody who has walked through that allotment site entrance gate, since 1991, for over 20 yrs (sic) could not know that - what is in effect, their back garden (or use to be) - contained a specific number of plots remains an mystery :(

Moral of the tale? There is no limit to the amount of perjurious bullshit a court of law is willing and able to swallow when that court is willing to accept bullshit evidence which is wilfully false and untrue.

2Bcontd... 

Amersham Crown Court 5. Sept. 2013 - a quick synopsis of my initial encounter with the bewigged Judge hearing my appeal in respect of the content and span of the Crown evidence on which I appear before him to be heard and judged by him. The CPSs Barrister did NOT spare the rod. They brought EVERYTHING INTO COURT! i.e. the allotment, the car, the reg. plate, the BT bullshit, the ET bullshit and all the rest of the Crown's witness's TOTAL BULLSHIT as in: Listen to all of this Judge, it's outrageous and then listen to our star witness - who is going to perform for your Worships from behind a sight blocking screen. Why Your Honor? Because our witness refuses, point blank refuses to give evidence in a public court of law if the black man he is seeking to have convicted can see him in any way. He does not want the black man in the dock to observe his movement and his physical demeanor as he sits in the witness box and - metaphorically - has a bowl movement in semi privacy. Our witness is only prepared to give evidence in court where only a limited number of people - who are all complete strangers to him - can see and hear the sound of the product of his - metaphorical - bowl movement. n.b. I'm bloody sure of one thing, I could hardly hear fuck all of what was being mumbled into the public record under oath, as evidence against me by the Crown's star witness, exactly the same as in Milton Keynes Magistrates' Court where again the CPSs witness was permitted to have a bowl movement in semi privacy from behind a screen 30+mtrs distance from me & I was behind glass - but that's a whole other story as they say :(

re; given the above intro info: Concerning the Judge hearing my appeal it was a case of me knowing exactly what the CPS are going to do over the course of the day to get the conviction to stick, because I know all their 'bullshit' evidence inside out and how they would put it across and how they will make it sound in their submissions to the court.

So in effect it was a case of me taking what were those many big sticks the CPSs Barrister and their witness were going to use to - perjuriously - clobber me with in front of the Judge and me saying to the Judge: Here you are Judge, which one do you want to beat me with?

And the Judge replying: That's the wrong question Mr Jarvis. Your question to me should be: Which one do I want to beat you with, first?

That IS exactly what I and my Brief were up against on that excellent Thursday in court in Amersham :)

quick rough first draft...

An extremely interesting and eventful day. Will life long in the memory. (like for the rest of my days :)

4. Sept. 2013 My legal aid Solicitors tells me: Colin your Crown Court appeal hearing is tomorrow at Amersham 10 a.m but we haven't got the name of your Barrister as yet. Good luck Colin

Arrived at court for 9:30 a.m. 

My Barrister, (a man who by 16:00 hrs I knew to be an extremely competent, very able professional legal expert, of whom I cannot speak highly enough and to whom I am indebted) travels from his Chambers in London, battling through the railways network.

Introductions over, soon into conference with my Brief.

Oops! I didn't realise that, I didn't know that!

Hmmm, well you should have been told. That's what it is.

This, Mr Jarvis, is an appeal to the Crown Court of your conviction of the 25/6/13 & of your sentence of the 16/7/13. You are, in effect, to be tried a second time before a Crown Court Judge and two magistrates. I am your legal Counsel in these proceedings. A CPS Barrister is prosecuting you on behalf of the State and their witness is one Mr _____ _____.

Is ______ here? the ____!

Please, Mr Jarvis, do not refer to the Crown's witness in those terms when we are in court.

I, metaphorically, rolled up my sleeves and for half an hour parleyed with my Brief, respectfully and diligently instructing Counsel for the defence until the court usher tells us that: Gentlemen da Judge is in da house! and so into court No.4 we went. I was very excited and full of anticipation.

2Bcontd...